Terez Owens

If your anything like me, you have no idea why girls are so obsessed with Perez Hilton and all of his celebrity bullshit. Who gives a shit about Jon and Kate, Chaz Bono, or Emmanuel Lewis. “What chu talking bout Willis” (sorry I had to say it). Here are 3 actual headlines from PerezHilton.com right this second.

1. “The McConaughey-Alves Fam!”
2. “Mariah Must Love Brazil!”
3. “Sharon Osbourne Selling Her Cans On Ebay!”

Honestly, who gives a rats ass about any of these people? Oh, and for the record, I fucking hate Matthew McConaughey with a passion.

I basically don’t care about any celebrity unless it’s a hot chick and she’s in a sex tape. Actually, I take that back. Sex tapes suck. Celebrity sex-tapes usually consist of some grainy footage or infrared nightcam i-can’t-see-shit-except-green-and-black footage of some douchebag porking some coked up celebrity for 7 minutes. Boring!

To make matters worse, usually the dude is holding the camera, so we are basically treated to a cock-fest the entire time. If you watched the Pam Anderson sex tape in 6th grade like I did, you know exactly what i’m talking about. Why the fuck would I want to see that when I could simply go to Brazzers.com and see true sluts such as Jenna Haze, Gianna Michaels and Briana Banks get stuffed on the internet in High Definition?

Getting back on topic, there’s this site called www.terezowens.com. It’s basically Perez Hitlon for dudes. It’s like the manlier less-gay version of Perez Hilton. Or TMZ for jocks, as I like to call it. Now I understand why girls are so obsessed with gossip.

I caught myself looking this shit for hours. I was all like “I didn’t know that scrub Kyler Boller was fucking Ex-miss California, and bible banger bitch, Carrie Prejean.” Who doesn’t chuckle every time they hear that Antonio Cromaratie has 7 kids in 5 different states? That’s fucking impressive for a 25 year old.

I admit that this site is basically the same as Perez Hilton, except theres no bullshit about dudes who star in vampire movies on this site. It’s worth checking it out.

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