Root for Lebron?

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I think it’s interesting that a majority of sports fans in America would openly root for the German Uberman, Dirk Nowitzki, who is straight out the pages of a Nietzche essay, rather than a spectacularly black, All-American like Lebron James. Like, news flash America, just cause Dirk is white, doesn’t make him American. I know it’s hard for a lot of you guys to get behind a whiny, cry baby, mental midget like Lebron instead of supporting a giant no nonsense white dude like Dirk. But let’s take a look at some of the deeper issues that are going on with that decision ova’ here.

The most interesting sociological parallel is that both Dirk and Lebron are the epitome of the physiological perfection of their race. I know a lot of people don’t believe in evolution or that genocide strengthens a race, but I do, so I think that Dirk definitely benefited from the holocaust and Nazi Germany genetic experiments, just as much as LeBron benefitted from selective slave breeding over the years. Dirk is Hitler’s wet dream, and Lebron represents Hitler’s worst nightmare. For the first time in in sports it’s the ultimate white guy vs the ultimate black guy… and two of his friends. Seems like a lot of Americans are forgetting where they come from, and would rather see an evil German win the NBA title than an American Olympian. It’s weird, and I suspect that it’s because you are all racisssss. I should know, I’m just as racist as the next guy- but racism has no place in sports. Let’s save that shit for when it’s appropriate, like at restaurants or your sister’s house.

Don’t get it twisted, no one represents the American Dream better than my man Martin Luther the King James. You’re supposed to want bigger and better things as an American. You’re supposed to want to manifest your own damn destiny. It would have been un-American of him to stay in Cleveland. America is all about powerful mergers like the one he pulled, scandal, corruption, freedom, and beach front property. No one understands that better than Lebron.

Lebron wants to be liked sooo bad. He wants to be the good guy, and I think it kills him inside that he’ll never be loved as much as Jordan. Maybe Jordan was so good because he fed off of the love. All Lebron gets is hate, and it probably effects his game on some level. He’s been mentally abused by the sports world since he was in middle school. Everyone has and still does want a piece of him. Everything he does is scrutinized, criticized, and hyperbolized. Personally, I appreciate his showmanship. He is a brand, he’s the most athletically dominating human being on the planet at times, but underneath it all he’s still just a kid. He was never given the chance to mature as normal human, and now he has issues. Where’s his Dad? He may walk a thin line between Michael Jordan and Michael Jackson for the rest of his life. If he starts opening up amusement parks, watch out. Until then, I feel for the guy, you can’t begin to understand the kind of pressure he’s under, and I hope he gets his ring.

I’m a big fan of both Dirk and Lebron, so I don’t want anyone to think that I got it out for Dirk or Germans for that matter. I like Germans. I like German beer, German women, German existentialism, and German cars. I wanted Dirk to win the Title in 2006. But he does play for Dallas, and that’s not something I can over look so easily. I hate Dallas. I gotta go with Lebron here. I’ve been down with LBJ from the ZOOM I days and I’m not stopping now. Heat in 7. Now stop being so damn racist and go root for America.

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One Response to “Root for Lebron?”

  1. bizznatches Says:

    Why is LeBron all-American? 99.9% of the world cant relate to LeBrons life. I dont think its a white/black issue. Its just that Dirk grew up middle class and was in the military and stuff… he is understandable. LeBron has been spoiled since high school. His whole life is a fantasy. I like your writing by the way. Though, you seem fixated with racial issues.

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