Dog Pimping?

 

www.barstoolsports.com

gawker It seems an Irish woman died after an allergic reaction to a dog—a dog she had sex with. Yes. Really. From Ireland, the land of geniuses like James Joyce, Oscar Wilde, and Bono, comes this story of a 43-year-old woman who encountered a man in a bestiality chat room and then met him at his house in Limerick. She had sex with his Alsatian dog and then had a severe allergic reaction shortly afterwards, possibly from the dog’s semen. She later died at the hospital. The incident apparently took place in 2008, but medical experts just confirmed the cause of death, because the case is finally making its way to court, not because it took them this long to get over the shock of how she died. The dog owner, Sean McDonnell, is charged with “buggery” for ordering the dog to commit the act. Buggery is apparently still a crime on the books in Ireland, so thank God for that. McDonnell is thought to be the first person charged with it since it was enacted in 1861.

How are you in good conscience gonna charge my man with ‘buggery’ for setting up a sex date for his dog and some beast-slutty mother of four? That’s like charging someone with ‘mischief’ or ‘tom foolery’. “What they got you in for, partna?” “Oh…uh…Hijinks.” See? It’s not fair sending a dude to jail with a charge like that.

If anything this guy should be charged with dog pimping cause that’s exactly what went down. Now I don’t know if homey got any money from the whole dogsex scenario, or if there were any doggy blowjobs or some weird furry foreplay involved, but it seems like he was a pretty solid middleman throughout this whole process. The lady wanted to fuck a dog, and he simply provided the canine willing to give her the red rocket. Not his fault she had peanut/dog semen allergies.

One last thing — screw this newspaper for protecting her identity but putting the dog pimp’s name on full blast. SHE’S the one having sex with dogs. He simply organized a way to get his dog laid. Why should her name not get tarnished in this whole process? She gets no posthumous criminal charges or recognition, yet he’s stuck going to trial for BUGGERY and having his name splattered across the internets.

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