Do People Really Care About Women’s Soccer?

Do people really care about women’s soccer? I’m not even trying to be a dick, but I don’t get it. Is it like a root for your country thing? Kind of like when Michael Phelps won all those gold medals in the Olympics and people pretended to give a shit about Men’s Swimming for two weeks.   Or do people legitimately care? 

I’ll be the first to admit it, I don’t know dick about soccer, let alone women’s soccer.  I could give two shits about Hans Solo, or whatever that chicks name is.  I always thought that soccer was a sport for the kids who weren’t athletic enough to play basketball and whose  mothers wouldn’t allow them to play football.  I have friends, who are dudes, that are going to bars to watch women’s soccer.  You got to call “no homo” on that.   I feel like this is a bad episode of the Twilight Zone, and I’m in an alternate universe where the president is black and women’s soccer is America’s pastime.

Or maybe it’s because there are like two maybe three cute chicks on the team?  But then again,  that still wouldn’t justify watching the “sport”.  (I put the word sport in parentheses, because I’m not even sure if soccer is a sport or a hobby).  There’s plenty of fap worthy material all over the internet, so I couldn’t fathom that someone would have to watch women’s soccer to get their rocks off.  I’m just glad it’s over.  I’m sick of having my Facebook news feed filled with statuses about how hot Alex Morgan is.  She’s hot, I get it, now STFU.

Everytime soccer fans try and stick up for the sport, they always have the same comeback.  “Soccer is the most popular sport in the world.”  Well guess what asshole, we are not in Chile, Paraguay, Mexico, or whatever other shitty third world country you want to name.  Soccer is popular around the world because they can’t afford the equipment to play real sports.  So they go out to a field and kick around a ball.  Some countries are so poor they can’t even afford a ball, so they kick around a grapefruit.  This is America.  We play football, basketball, baseball.  Hell even hockey and lacrosse.  Not soccer.  I know what you’re thinking.  “But Madchuck, they play soccer in England, and they are wealthy.”  Well English people are pussies. 

I really hope the NFL lockout ends.  When grown men are going to sports bars to watch women’s soccer, you know there ain’t shit going on in sports world.  Last week Casey Anthony, this week women’s soccer.  I can only imagine what next week has in store.

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