Face-Off?

CNNA 37-year-old man received an extensive face transplant stretching from his hairline down to the neck, including a jaw, full set of teeth, tongue and cheeks. The surgery essentially replaced most of the patient’s face except for his eyes and the back remnant of his throat. Richard Lee Norris of Hillsville, Virginia, is the 23rd patient to receive a face transplant in the world.  His doctors at the R. Adams Cowley Shock Trauma Center at the University of Maryland Medical Center say this operation is the most extensive surgery of its kind because of the extent of the transplant and the placement of an entire set of teeth. “The face will look like a blend of the donor as well as Richard,” said Dr.Eduardo D. Rodriguez, associate professor of surgery at the University of Maryland School of Medicine.  “There are some unique features, his nose, the chin that have been replaced in entirety. Other than that, it’s a combination of both individuals.” The hospital did not release details about the anonymous donor, due to the family’s request. The family specifically consented to the face transplant procedure.

I probably would have opted for a less frightening face as well, but you gotta admit that middle face is fantastic.  He looked like that old Keystone Light bitter beer face guy, only if they transplanted penis skin for his nose.  Just an eye-opening Face/Off-like transformation for our hero here.  Early Richard was just a normal kid with a healthy unibrow, middle Rich looked like he was playing banjo in a West Virginian shed and hid a bunch of meth in his mouth just as the cops busted in, and current Rich looks like a Hollywood-quality mask of that kid who shot up Virginia Tech a few years back.  All in all I’d chalk this up as a one in the win column for medical science.

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